Laughter for Life

1000 pesos for a look

2008-03-10T09:31:00.000-07:00

A man goes over to his buddy's house and knocks on the door, it opens and there stands his friends wife. "Is Michael home?" he asks.

She replies "No I'm sorry he's gone out to run a few errands."

"Would you mind if I came in and waited for a few minutes?"

She opens the door and he follows her down the hall and into the kitchen. "I can't help to notice how beautiful your breasts look in that robe. I will pay you P1000 if I could just see one of them."

The woman thinks it over for a moment and figures why not, it is P1000. She opens her robe exposing one of her breasts as the man reaches for his wallet, pulls out a P1000 bill and throws it on the table. Shortly there after while drinking his coffee he asks "Your breast was so beautiful, I've got to see them both at the same time, I will pay you another
P1000 if you will show me them both."

She once again thinks for a moment and decides, what the hell and opens her robe giving him a good long look. He then opens his wallet, grabs another P1000 throws it on the table and says, "I can't wait any longer, I must get going. Please tell Michael I came by."

About ten minutes pass and Michael comes home. His wife meets him in the hall and says "Your friend came by, you just missed him, he left ten minutes ago."

Michael replies, "Did he drop off the P20o0 he owes me?

Dress of love

2008-03-10T08:56:00.000-07:00

An old woman went to visit her daughter and she found her naked, waiting for her husband.

The mother asks the daughter, said, “Why you are naked?"

The daughter responds, and said, “This is the dress of love."

When the mother returns home, she strips naked and waits for her husband.

When her husband arrives, he asks her, and said “What are you doing naked?"

She responds, and said “This is the dress of love."

and Well," he says to her, “GO IRON IT!!!."

CNN - Phone inthe Future

2008-02-15T23:31:00.000-08:00

Samsung latest model of cellphone.... YOU WILL SING WHILE YOU SLEEP!!!
"for REAL news about phone in the future see CNN website here"
OR for more laughter for life visit mappspeed.blogspot.com here .......

CNN - Phones in the FUTURE!!

2008-02-15T23:10:00.000-08:00

WHAT A PHONE!!! Everyone must have it for us not to forget where we placed our phones!!

Loving wife

2008-02-12T19:48:00.000-08:00

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 30 years. He breaks into a house and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, then get the lady and goes into the dressing room. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped from prison, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. " If he wants something, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. That guy is probably very dangerous. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "No honey, He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Chinese Restaurant

2008-02-10T18:49:00.000-08:00

A man is having a dinner at a Chinese Restaurant noticed the table had been set with forks, not with chopsticks. He asked the waiter why. The waiter said, "Sir, Chopstick were provided only on request."

"But,"the man countered, if you gave your patrons chopsticks, you wouldn't have to pay someone to wash all your forks."

"True," the waiter said back, "but we would have hire three more people to clean up the mess."

Laughter for lLife # 4

2008-01-29T17:21:00.000-08:00

A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"

Laughter for Life # 3

2008-01-28T09:35:00.001-08:00

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year-old son.

They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad?". To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex."

"Oh I see.", replied the boy, pensively. "Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school." He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and ask, "Why are there 3 in this package?"

The dad replies, "Those are for high-school boys. One for Friday, one for Saturday and one for Sunday."

"Cool!" says the boy. He notices a 6-pack and asks "Then who are these for?"

"Those are for college men", the dad answers, "TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday and TWO for Sunday."

”WOW!" exclaimed the boy;" Then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking up a 12-pack.

With a sigh, the dad replied, "Those are for married men, One for January, one for February, one for March..."

Laughter for Life # 2

2008-01-28T08:38:00.001-08:00

One day 5 year old boy ask her Dad... "Dad my classmates had told me that in the news this morning Mr. Congresman had a video scandal with his secretary. Dad said, "Son, you tell your classmates that they should not listen and watch with those news because its not appropriate with your age. His son nods and say, "Dad, I think, I should not watch Mom and our Driver doing their scandal...

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Laughter for Life # 1

2008-01-25T08:09:00.000-08:00

Two common workers are having conversation regarding salary increased:

Worker #1: Hey when is the last time we had an increase in our salary?
Worker #2: Last 3 years ago..., why?
Worker #1: gosh!! its been three years and salary is still the same...
Worker #2: Me, I'm not hoping for salary increase,,,
Worker #1: WHy?
Worker #2: I'm hoping for PAY BACK TIME!!!
WOrker #1: Oppsss... No.. no.. Look you GOT TO BELIEVE IN MAGIC...
Prices of commodities are increasing...
Government says that economic are increasing...
Some Government Officials corruption are increasing...
Population are increasing...
everything seems to increase...
So don't loose hope Bro.

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